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There Once Was a Man From Nantucket…

August 8, 2014

“…Who drank his java from a bucket?”


nantucket limerick

The limerick is defined by Wikipedia as “a form of poetry, especially one in five-line anapestic meter with a strict rhyme scheme…” OK, some of you may know what a “anapestic meter” is, but the rest of you can just read this winner of the Irish “Listowel Writers Week” prize in 1998:

Writing a Limerick’s absurd,
Line one and line five rhyme in word,
And just as you’ve reckoned
They rhyme with the second;
The fourth line must rhyme with the third.

Our favorite online encyclopedia adds that the limerick is “sometimes obscene with humorous intent.” So with that brief introduction to the poetic form, here’s one of the most creative pieces of customer survey feedback we’ve ever received:

Getting paid for my time sure is swell.
But this software makes me wan¬t to yell!
I just saved that row, where the heck did it go?
I think Kronos was spawned deep in hell.

The customer goes on to explain the difficulty dealing with Java in their environment and then closes with the following:

“You need to rewrite this software from the ground up. No more f*cking Java. Radically simple UI. Runs on any browser. You’ve taken something profoundly simple like time tracking and turned it into a monstrosity.”

Of course one of our engineers contacted the customer to assure them our software was not spawned in hell, and to explain our migration from Java to newer technologies like HTML5, the level of Java-free functionality we already deliver in Workforce Central 7, and our road-map to a Java-free future. And of course we thanked him for his poetic sense of humor about the situation.

Happy Friday.

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